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(+2)

Hey, I noticed you wrote that you were interested in constructive criticism in the end-notes, so I jotted down some thoughts about the text. (See pastebin link). I scribbled my feedback pretty quickly, so there's some misspellings and such, but I hope you understand the intent behind my feedback.

https://pastebin.com/qk8nQuDJ

Good luck with the continuation of the story. :)

(1 edit)

Woo! Yes! Thank you for the generous feedback!

I'm glad that you made time to analized my writing very carefully and to clarify some of your questions, 

In my country Michael is actually sometimes used as names for females and is pronounced as Meeka-el and the male version is Mikel

And yeap I knew someone would get lost in my wordings as I am mainly influenced by much older texts and odd vocabulary, but there is a reason why the timing and memory isn't chronological as you would likely see in future updates. :3

But I do agree on most parts as I tend to make clunky writing. 

And don't worry, as I am vigorously working on improving it and getting back my previous skills since I stopped writing nearly 4 years ago due to work and generally experiencing my first years of being an adult and out of school. That or the toxic work :/

Also I'll be applying some of your feedback asap like the spelling and thank you for giving me a new name for one of the races! XD

I shall call them the "Borne" short for werebear :3

Thanks in partnership with Microsoft word's autocorrect! Lol

(+1)

I think I liked it, I can't wait for the release to enjoy more🥰🤎🤎

It doesnt want to download at all....pls fix this..it looks sooo goood!

Which one are you trying to download? I've checked on my end and it seems to be fine

windows

Huh that's odd I have 2 devices that has windows and they don't have any issues perhaps try using a different browser or download it through another device like a smartphone then copy it onto the computer 

Probably the itch app...I'll try the browser 

windows

(+2)

hmmmhmmmmmmm

So, what do you think? :3

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